We’re living in times where the fight for women's safety, rights, and freedom is threatened, now more than ever more. And the reality is, we’re tired of having to scream from the rooftops for basic rights.
The recent events back home, in India, of the brutal and sickening instance of the rape and murder of a young resident doctor on her break while on hospital campus, is yet another wake-up call and stark reminder that women are not safe anywhere.
Incidents like this can be triggering for women like me who grew up in India, experiencing varying degrees of sexual assault on an a daily basis. I’d like to share one such incident that I had buried somewhere deep in my memory and hadn’t thought about in more than a decade.
I was 22, fresh out of college, and riding the Mysore-Bangalore train like I did every weekend to learn Bharatanatyam from my Guru. The train pulled into Bangalore’s City Railway Station around 4 pm.
During the journey, a young 17 year old guy sat across from me. He seemed harmless, like any other passenger. But as I got off the train, I noticed him trailing behind me. At first, I brushed it off, thinking it was just a coincidence. But as I made my way through the chaotic maze of the Majestic Bus Stand, I realized he was still following me.
My gut told me something wasn’t right and I picked up my pace, darting through the throngs of people, my heart pounding. I finally spotted the slightly more expensive AC local bus that would take me home and decided that would be “safer” than the regular one. I sprinted towards it, barely making it inside as the doors shut behind me.
Once inside, I quickly ducked under my seat, as I write this I can still feel the panic that 22 year old me felt that day. I vividly remember popping my head up and spotting him right outside the bus peeking to see if I was there. The bus jerked into motion, and only when we were safely out of the station did I it back on my seat.
PS: I know I’m not alone, and that my story is just a drop in the ocean.
Anything could have happened that day, and I’m thankful I was safe. But that experience left a scar so deep, it gives me the shudders even today.
If there’s one thing that is clear, it’s that women don’t need a list of rules on what not to wear, where not to go, or how not to act. These lists, disguised as "protection," are just another way to control us. What women need is genuine safety— the kind that doesn’t come with strings attached, the kind that guarantees our right to walk down any street, in any outfit, at any time, without fear, just like our male counterparts do without ever having to second-guess these mundane micro-decisions. It's time to stop policing women and start educating young boys and men.
Speaking of policing women, our sisters in Afghanistan are facing unimaginable oppression. The Taliban’s recent ban on women singing in public isn’t just a policy—it’s an attempt to erase half the population from the public eye. It’s more than just silencing voices; it’s an outright attack on our existence, our joy, and our culture. This isn’t just about music; it’s about the power to control how, where, and if women are even seen or heard.
And even in a so-called “superpower” women are not excempt from it. Here in the United States, reproductive rights are hanging by a thread. The battle isn’t just about abortion; it’s about every woman’s right to make decisions about her own body. To live life on her terms. Watching these rights slip away feels like watching our autonomy being slowly stripped from us.
All of these aren’t isolated issues; they’re part of a bigger, global problem where women are continually forced to fight for rights that should be a given. We DON’T NEED protection, and we don’t need permission to exist freely—we need a world that recognizes our right to be safe, to be heard, and to have control over our own lives.
It’s time to stop waiting for change and start demanding it. Enough is enough.
A dear friend recommended this book to me last year, and it sat on my book shelf until the recent events unfolded and it compelled me to pick it up. I’m more than half way through the book and here are my thoughts:
Why Loiter? Women and Risk on Mumbai Streets by Shilpa Phadke, Sameera Khan, and Shilpa Ranade is a bold examination of women's right to public spaces in urban India. The authors challenge the traditional narrative that women must avoid public spaces to stay safe, arguing instead for women's freedom to loiter without purpose or fear. The book critiques the societal norms that confine women to their homes or demand they justify their presence in public. It's a powerful call to reclaim the streets, emphasizing that true safety comes not from restricting women's movements but from enabling their right to access and enjoy public spaces on their own terms.
I was doing some digging around for organizations/initiatives that are working with boys/young men, and I came across “The Equal Community Foundation”. ECF is driving grassroots change by educating boys and young men in India to challenge gender norms and advocate for girls' rights. Through targeted programs, ECF engages boys aged 13-17 to understand gender equality, respect women, and reject harmful stereotypes.
By working directly in communities, the organization helps build a safer, more equitable society where boys grow up as allies, contributing to the safety and empowerment of girls. Their efforts focus on creating long-term cultural shifts towards gender justice and equality.
Graduates of one of their programs “Action for Equality” make a pledge to become allies with girls and women, committing to take gender-equitable actions in their daily lives. The goal? To build a society where girls and women feel safe, not just in public, but in their own homes. By empowering boys to demand girls' rights, they are fostering a future where safety isn’t a luxury, but a given. It's a bold step towards rewriting the narrative of what it means to grow up male in India, and the impact will be felt for generations.
Season 4 of the Chai Break Podcast ☕️ is brewing! This season, it’s going to be just me, Shwetha, as my lovely co-host Rema takes a well-deserved break to focus on family.
Launching during 🌍 Climate Week (Sept 22-29th) with a theme close to my heart—Sustainable Living. We will dive into building an equitable society, caring for our planet, and so much more, with some badass South Asian women entrepreneurs leading the charge in climate tech and sustainability.
So, get ready for thought-provoking #chaiversations! ✨
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